also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
