I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
