Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
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