That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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