Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Randomize
