I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
