Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
