jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
