is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
