so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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