I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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