dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize
