hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
