i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
