I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
