i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
