you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
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