I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
