What a fucking waste of an outfit
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Randomize
