we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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