These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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