omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Randomize
