somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I just found puke in my bra..
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
