I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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