Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
