She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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