love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Randomize
