did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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