the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
my being single is dangerous.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
