I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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