Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize
