I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Randomize
