It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
