Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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