Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
should my penis look like a turkey
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I made him laugh his dick is mine
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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