I'm lost and stupid without you.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
