Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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