after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
