I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
