i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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