i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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