it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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