Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize