There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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