the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize