I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
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