3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
