I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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