I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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