I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
